150
Random Things You Should Know About Me,
Or,
An Autobiography in 150 Lines
I
work in a university library, buying books.
I
have watched at least one sci-fi movie each week of my married life.
I
read the Bible daily.
I
grew up on a farm, and I’m realizing that just never leaves a person.
I
find more satisfaction in marriage than I ever thought I could.
I
don’t like housework. Except laundry. I heart laundry.
I
don’t understand what people see in sweet potatoes.
Each
morning I check about 50 blogs and webpages.
I’m
a quiet person, and I think people mistake quiet for critical and standoffish.
I
can be resentful, impatient, stubborn, selfish, insecure, sensitive, jealous, judgmental,
and completely lacking in self-confidence.
I
can also be assertive, generous, compassionate, helpful, playful, joyful,
radiant, creative, and hilarious.
I’m
a voracious reader of nonfiction (memoirs mostly).
I
have not taken medicine of any kind since February 2007.
I’ve
always wanted people to see me as wise and to come to me for advice.
I
care too much what people think.
The
male pronoun used generically doesn’t bother me.
I’m
good with emotion but not with the physical expression of it.
I
wish I could take beautiful photographs.
I
think small talk is a waste of time.
I
love poetry. I believe there’s a lot of bad poetry. I believe a great deal of
bad poetry is written by overeducated poets.
I
think I’m good at smiling. There are smaller things to be good at. There are
less needful things to be good at.
I
floss, I get eight hours of sleep, I drink lots of water, I send Christmas
letters, I wear sensible shoes, I use Times New Roman, and I never run out of
batteries or toothpaste or paper towels or detergent or Ziploc bags.
I
write lists to relax.
I
am the stepmother of two kids my age.
I’m
pro-life.
I
attended a state university.
I
write to know what I know.
I
collect antique photos, porcelain dogs, dog paintings, and glass Christmas
ornaments.
I
love the weight of a strand of pearls around my neck.
I
own 16 pairs of khaki pants.
I
crave pico de gallo almost all of the
time.
I
fall in love with wood grain.
I’m
a details person, which is getting harder and harder to be.
I’ve
hardly seen a sitcom I didn’t like.
A
lot of people mistakenly call me
“Becky.”
I
think growing tomatoes can change your life.
I
don’t fully trust people who don’t have books in their home.
I
never wear makeup.
I
judge books by their covers.
I
dislike open-concept homes.
After
taking off my shoes, I always tuck the laces into them.
I
don’t eat many sweets, but every now and then I have a strong craving for cake.
I
buy all my clothes used.
I
have gray hair, and I’ve learned that ignoring it doesn’t make it less gray.
I
can’t imagine a different life, though, like most folks, I constantly desire
one.
When
I find mistakes in books I circle them. (I find a lot of mistakes in books.)
I’ve
never tasted beer.
In
the winter I sleep under six blankets.
Oh
weekdays, I get up at 5:45, and I go to bed before 10:00.
I
hate the sound of teeth on silverware.
I’ve
always wanted a dog, but I’m afraid to get one.
When
I feel nostalgic, it’s for Christmas Eve candlelight services, the smell of my
childhood haymow, and church potluck dinners.
I’m
sentimental, and I have several too-heavy-to-carry boxes of old cards, letters,
and school papers to prove it.
Every
year I host Thanksgiving, then take off the next day to put up our Christmas
tree.
My
Christmas tree has hundreds of ornaments on it.
I
grow odd attachments to weird things like shoeboxes, name tags, and old notes.
I
hoard candy and then forget to eat it.
I’m
always cold.
I
love pajamas.
I
discovered yoga pants last year, and they’ve changed my life.
During
the silent prayer time at church, I always pray for wisdom and mercy.
I
have yet to decide if I want a child, and I’m learning to be okay with
that.
The
first thing I ever cooked by myself was potato soup with egg and flour
dumplings.
I
once got a good rejection letter from Poetry magazine.
My
favorite number is 19, my favorite color is green, and my favorite season is
spring.
Any
movie with a dog in it will make me cry.
I
own around 700 books.
It’s
safe to say I’ve never understood one word of Shakespeare, and I’m still
baffled as to why.
The
furniture showroom tags are still on our sofa though we bought it two years
ago. It’s an inside joke that even I don’t understand.
I
have a Bachelor’s degree in English (creative writing).
I
believe the Bible when it says that God is of purer eyes than to behold evil.
I
eat small things (Skittles, Goldfish crackers, blueberries) in twos.
I’ve
never been cool, and never really wanted to be.
Each
Christmas I send my husband’s ex-wife a calendar with photos of her kids and
grandkids.
When
I was little, I wanted to be a teacher; when I was in high school, I wanted to
be an interior decorator; when I was in college, I wanted to be a writer. Now,
I have no idea what I want to be.
I
met my husband online, but I met him for the first time in person outside a
public library. That’s also where he proposed to me.
When
I brush my teeth, I start on the lower right side.
I
love Chinese delivery.
I
rotate everything from bath towels to underwear and socks to silverware and
bowls for even use.
I’m
5’7”.
I
didn’t learn to ride a bike until I was 30 (and I haven’t ridden since).
I
teach Sunday School.
I
make much of my own jewelry.
I
really dislike sports.
The
first movie I saw in a theatre was Muppets
Take Manhattan. I was seven years old.
I
don’t like white gold.
I
don’t like sweet and salty together.
States
I’ve been in: Wisconsin, Minnesota, Illinois, Indiana, Ohio, Iowa, Nebraska,
Colorado, California.
I
love Chicago.
There
is a Bible and a dictionary in my living room.
My
favorite way to de-stress is to shuffle a deck of cards.
My
father always told me the worst thing in the world is waiting.
My
mother always told me to never marry a farmer. I married a musician instead.
In
high school, Reba McEntire was my favorite celebrity.
I
love movie soundtracks. They’re about the only music I listen to at home.
The
only time I remember getting into trouble when I was little was in kindergarten
when I deliberately rubbed paste on my pants because all the other kids were
doing it.
I
worked as a carhop for four summers in high school and college. (Sans
roller-skates.)
While
shopping in grocery store, I re-shelve misplaced or fallen items.
I
keep up on politics and current events.
I
fully anticipate writing a book someday.
I
never hit the snooze.
I’ve
had a crush on Jay Leno for years.
I’ve
only flown once.
I
have a hard time wanting to watch kids’ movies.
I
don’t own or use an i-device. I don’t have an MP3 player. I’m not on Facebook.
I don’t Pintrest. I don’t Instagram. I don’t Tweet.
I
love to cook for myself but dislike cooking for others.
I
think I’m still afraid of clowns.
I’ve
read my poetry on stage numerous times. I wasn’t nervous.
I
don’t take criticism well.
Organizing is my superpower.
I
don’t like the feel of fingernail polish. It’s like my fingertips can’t
breathe.
I
like my bananas green.
I’d
rather people think I’m smart than pretty.
I
panic when I have to find a seat in a crowded room or a dark movie theatre.
I’ve
worked at my alma mater for 15 years.
I
often eat dessert first to get it out of the way.
I
never know what I want.
I
do all of my crying in the bathroom. And most of my praying, too.
I
can think of almost nothing more personally terrifying-slash-humiliating than
having to dance in front of others.
In
nearly every photo of me from infancy on, my head is cocked to the left.
I’ll
never fully believe that people can run a marathon. Even five miles. It’s a
myth, right?
I
am one of those rare creatures who actually procrastinates pleasure.
I
have a thing for second person narration.
I’ve
never been good at knowing what questions to ask.
It
takes me a good 20 minutes to peel an orange.
Thick
books still intimidate me.
Even
the thought of drinking milk sort of makes me gag.
I
deeply admire minimalism, but I’m beginning to accept it’s just not in my
makeup.
I’ve
been considering adoption for years.
Up
until about a year ago, I called it “a scissor” instead of “scissors.”
My
hometown has a population of 419. My high school graduating class had 48
members.
I’ve
always wondered why someone would desire to be a dental hygienist or a
geologist.
I
can’t whistle.
When
people spell words, I have a hard time following.
I
call the noon meal dinner and the evening meal supper.
Once
I start a book or a movie, I almost always finish it. I have to know how it
ends.
My
husband says most of our misunderstandings stem from the fact that I don’t talk
loud enough.
I
hate to entertain.
I
have never baked cookies by myself.
I
have 501 (positive) feedback on eBay.
I’m
afraid of heights.
I
don’t know how to swim.
I’ve
never worn toenail polish.
I
think I only pretend to like spinach.
I
love washing my face.
I
love grocery shopping.
I
used to have an online shop where I sold antique photos.
I
save the box for everything.
I
don’t burn my candles.
I’m
pretty sure I wear Mom Jeans.
That has to be the most hilarious list of facts about someone that I've ever seen.
ReplyDeleteSigned,
Her husband.
just wow....start writing a book...loved these facts of yours. quite relatable to me .
ReplyDeleteI really enjoy the list. I visited this blog for the first time and I have never met you, but I felt as if you were next to me. Thank you from Japan.
ReplyDelete